Oladipo Ademola Esq

http://www.neowin.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=615824

^^ source of joke

Two guys meet up in a bar. The first one asks, “Did your hear the news – Mike is dead??!!!”

“Whoah, what the happened to him?”

“Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn’t brake properly and boom – He hit the curb, the car flipped over and he crashed through the sunroof – Went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window.”

“What a horrible way to die!”

“No no, he survived that, that didn’t kill him at all. So, he’s landed in my upstairs bedroom and he’s all covered in broken glass on the floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He’s just dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones.”

“What a way to go, that’s terrible!”

“No no, that didn’t kill him — he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks and he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him.”

“Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!”

“No no, that didn’t kill him, he even survived that. So he’s on the downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the stove, but reached for a big pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned him all up.”

“Man, what a way to go!”

“No no, he survived that, he survived that! He’s lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn’t mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him.”

“Now that is one awful way to go!”

“No no, he survived that…”

“Hold on now, just how the heck did Mike die?”

“I shot him.”

“You shot him? What the heck did you shoot him for?”

“The man was destroying my house!”

Browsing somewhere, I just can’t remember (I am poor at keeping bookmarks), I saw a link pointing to http://kswissfreerunning.com. A viral marketing site (is that correct?).

A simple site, type in a few letters and express yourself. What it does is to download pre-recorded images of Foucan (was he not that guy running from James Bond in the new Casino Royale?) free-running around those characters. Yours truly decided to find out how many characters they had pre-recorded. http://kswissfreerunning.com/?m=4c0392afeb91ed9eaaee2f3744836231

I was somehow disappointed, I would have expected them to create different types of runs per character and pick them randomly, giving a better impression of free running.Try and type a character, like say, 15 times, the guy just keeps repeating himself. Boring

Too bad, numbers (by way of consequence “9″) were not included. Had to make do with free running – nigeriasite. That links shows all possible characters.

I know I had come across the page before, but it intrigued me all the same. Concept looks beautiful, but for how long can you sit comfortably on it?

More designs here.

ihoho is a little project I just started. It is meant to be a photoblog. Some pictures that I find fascinating will be posted there. Initially, I intended it for showcasing piictures of beautful nigerian ladies (which I will eventually convert it to), but for now, I’ll just show some pictures I find on the web.

The name “ihoho” is yoruba for Naked. The reason for the name is because I wanted to showcase the beauty of the nigerian female without any cosmetic hindrances. Hence, the reason for the “naked”. Sorry, no porn there.

ihoho

In the market for an apartment. I need to move. Quickly.

I talked to a number of agents. Stating my request. I want a 2 bedroom flat, at a minimum. I won’t mind a mansion, provided I still pay the price of a flat. Studio flats (or self-contains as they are known here) are out of the question. I need space.

Heard numerous prices. 250,000 naira per annum for a 2 bedroom flat. Depending on the location, its expensive. For me. Out of range of my budget.

Saw a place today that fits into my budget. And it is quite close to my office. Splendid. Oh, but wait, I thing. It is on the first floor and there was to be another floor. Meaning, the “decking” is open. Heat.

Especially at night. I’ll have to get an AC, strong fans and a powerful generator. Apart from that, I like the apartment.

No, no, no! I meant “Has Apple gone bananas?”. Well whichever way, it works for me. Thanks Rihanna
Seriously, has a good company gone bad? I have had the utmost respect for Apple in years past, even though I have never really used their products. My preference showed when I decided to purchase an Apple iPod instead of a Zune.

Macworld came and went. I did not attend, am in Nigeria. A new update for my iPod. Good. Download. Now my questions.

1. How come I can only use iTunes to download the update?
2. How come iTunes can’t resume an interrupted download? We have poor connections here, so when my download cancelled at 57.2mb out of 57.6 mb. After 3 hours!
3. How come I can not find out Apple is updating on my iPod apart from Rentals?
4. If that is the only update, why is it 57 megabytes?

Apple has a monopoly, agreed, but must it behave like …. tired, going to sleep.

I decided to try out my blog without those pesky google ads. Still checking

I know. We have these bulky machines littering our streets with their green lights (insert card here) and multicolored sign posts claiming 24 hour service. Indeed!

Humbled, by the menace of the ATM machine, I hereby recount my experience (and that of others). Some weeks ago (November 18), I was coerced by my woman to pay a visit to one of my relatives, my mother. Not having cash, I did not feel bothered. I proudly whipped out one of my ATM cards (the only one with cash in its account) and strolled majestically to the nearest ATM.

1. Insert Card
2. Enter PIN
3. Select operation – withdrawal
4. Wait
5. Wait
6. Please wait… Transaction in Progress
7. Wait
8. Wait
9. Error: Cash Dispense Error

I called the notice of the security men who told me promptly that the ATM machine did not have enough cash to satisfy my request. N20,000.

I looked left, I looked right. I headed to the second nearest ATM and repeated actions 1 and 2. For action 3, I decided to check my balance. My account had been deducted. Though angry, I still made a withdrawal of N10,000 so I could get on with my life.

The following day, I reported to the bank, Access Bank Plc and was asked to fill a form and also report to my bank where my account is held. That I did. I was ASSURED that it would be resolved within 6 working days.

Almost 6 working weeks, the transaction is yet to be reversed. Access Bank staff say it has been forwarded to the headquarters. GT Bank staff say it has been forwarded to the headquarters.

My questions. Where is my money? Who do I hold responsible? When will I get my money?

A friend of mine also had the same problem, but with Intercontinental Bank (ATM) and GTBank (Account).

What are your experiences (positive or negative)?

Update: my money was refunded today including the N100 service charge. Though I had to meet with a staff of the bank who manages our company’s account.